"I am only one, but still I am one.
I cannot do everything, but still I can do something; and because I cannot do everything, I will not refuse to do something I can do."  ~ Edward Everett Hale

Changes

It's been a while. A lot of things got altered in my life. People I removed and kept. I've been bewildered about fantasy for so long where I forgot that reality is really striking. Realization really is something that even the very basic principle of my existence got shaken. The way I see things now is far different who I used to be. I'm a different person now. I'm stronger, less sensitive and started to love the real me.

Tanggapin mo na lang

Mahalaga ang mga kaibigan ko para sakin, hindi ko man ito madalas nasasabi sa kanila, madalas man ako makipag gagohan. Hindi ko parin hahayaan mawala kahit isa sa kanila. Ang sama ng loob ay hindi na dapat itinatago kung may problema sabihin ito ng harapan ng mapagusapan, Wag tayong lumikha ng pader na magbubukod sa ating mga buhay. kaangatang kilay ng pagbati o kaangatang kamay ng pagkasalubong naging parte ka parin ng buhay na meron ako. Tropa tayo Kaibigan kita nasayo parin ang respeto at tiwala ko.. Masakit mawalan ng isang kaibigan. ------RogerRaker

This is the end.....

Ikaw na mismo nagsabi. Wag kang magalala I'm done na po. Kung hinayaan mo lang akong makausap ka ng maayos di na dapat hahantong sa ganito. Napakitid kasi ng utak mo. NAPAKAKITID. NABUBUHAY KA SA NAKARAAN. Di ka marunong magpahalaga sa mga taong nakapaligid sayo. Di na ako magugulat kung bakit masmalungkot ang buhay mo kesa sa akin. PI kasi napakabait ko kaya ginaganito ako ng mga mapagpanggap na frogs. Nakakairita to the MAX. Mapagbigay akong tao, mapangunawa at higit sa lahat mapagmahal, kaso basura lang pala kasi nga daw mukha akong tae at peste lang pala. Well, isa lang masasabi ko sau kung sino kaman, KARMAHIN KA SANA.....

Rediculed

I'm starting to feel this very negative feeling again which I really hate. Is it just me or them? I think I really need a change....

Message

True, you are better than them because you are real. No hiding or anything. You are just being yourself. Yes, people tends to dissapoint, so dont expect from them too much, however, just go with the flow and learn not to dwell on things that you cant change. At the end of the day its always you. Sincerely attached, yes you are, treating us like your own is motherly and thats what I like about you. It's not a mistake, its just how you show your love because you care. People come and go, thats a fact, anyhow, its how you treat people that they can remember you no matter how moody, pessimistic and agitated you are. Why setting aside everything and creating a wall? Will it make a difference? Just to avoid it? I may be too young, not so serious about my life but I treasure my friends and I started to really love myself. I might not be perfect but I jive because I set a limitation to myself that I cant go beyond. I created a layer to protect myself from harm. People judge me because they can only see the photoshoped pictures not the authentic copy. I might be so childish, dramatic, fool, stupid, nonsense, dumb and always talks about my baby, but one thing is for sure, What you see is what you get.

Few very important lessons I've learned in this journey are:

1. UNDERSTANDING - You may not know everything but atleast you tried to see things in a different perspective instead of focusing on the obvious.

2. RESPECT - people has different opinions. If you want to be respected, respect yourself first. Expecting too much falls to this category.

3. LOVE - its the greatest gift of our dearly God. It has different flavors : Love with your family, partner or material things. Its the fifth element that set aside humans from animals. Although sometimes, i get hurt because of that love, I step back and just enjoy the moment of being inloved. Its a feeling that can destroy you too, but in due time, the love that you are longing for will just arrive in an instant, you just need to be patient and be thankful of what you have for the moment.

4. DONT BE JEALOUS - whenever My love talks about "you know what I mean", my mood suddenly changes. Reality check, I dont have the right to get hurt, to be jealous or anything because in the first place, nothing really started.

5. FOCUS - you should know your priorities in life and know how to balance things. having said that, success will follow and assurance that you have a backup plan whenever the first plan didnt work out fine.

I have a lot of disappointments in my life but I'm trying my best to be as good as I can be. To cut the chase, Im still learning.

Madness

I dont know what is happening but I just felt that something is wrong with me. Is it because I'm jealous? Is it because I'm just afraid about the unknown? Is it because I can never have the love that I've been longing for? Well, I really dont know...

I tend to react to simple things that really doesnt matter in the first place. I really thought that I would be able to overcome this negative feeling but there's really something in my subconscious mind that i can't grasp.

Wrong?

Do I need to have this feeling everytime i talk or message you? Do You really need to humilate me? Don't you really care about my feelings?

Dont you ever dare doing it again because from now on, ill fight for what is right and ignore those iricasible things that wont help me grow.

You are one of the few that I really care more than everything, but you are really pushing me to my limits.

Just wait and see when I fight back. You wont notice it at first but my pay back is very sweet that you can't even imagined.

I think I know what is wrong. It's not me but you. Do you like attention? Well, I'll give you want you want.

My First Hair Rebond

I thought the plan would change since my friend Earlon bought a new limited edition Nike Shoes. Good thing was, he made an arrangement with Ate Rose. Finally, I got my hair rebonded. I really love my new hair...

Asia Jaya LRT statio

I'm so excited. We are going to Bukid Bintang. Asual, Pasyal pasyal with friends..... :-)

Maggi Goreng with Dua Telur Mata

One of my favorites here in Malaysia. Yes, it's Maggi Noodles added with vegetables. You can usually order it at any mamak (carendreria).

Carrot Milk Juice

I started to like Carrot Juice recently. I even tried to have a carrot milk shake which was a failure of course. I really love the taste. Its so different compared to my country.

End - Wakas

May mga pagkakataon na kahit gusto nating manatiling walang pakialam sa mga nangyayare sa paligid eh napipilitan tayong magreact. Lahat ng bagay may limitasyon. Lahat ng nangyayare sa buhay natin ay may katapusan. Ika nga nila eh lahat ay may sukdulan.

May mga di maipaliwanag na puwersa dito sa mundong ibabaw na kahit pilit nating intindihin ay di parin natin maurok dahil ang maykapal bibigay nya lahat. Nasasayo nalang kung paano mo pagyayamanin.

Love at First Sight

"Love at first sight - it only means you are attracted to her face and body, but you can't fall deeply in love at any moment. It's by realizing who that person is, your partner for life....... "

- from the movie Bunjee Jumping Of Their Own....

Realization: Trust is synonymous to the truth

Its hard to accept the fact that the truth can hurt someone. But what if the truth is not really the truth? What if that truth was just used to cover up a longing? Questions that is really bothersome.

Frienship might be indangered because of lies. Lies that in the first place started with a reality that only created just to masked the solitude made by disperation.

Swear to god, it's not my intention to hurt people just because I want to satify that longing. Longing that is killing me. A dream that I created just for me to say that I'm happy. I dont want to hurt people. I just want to feel that I'm not left behind.

I'm really sorry if the dream I created ruined someone's life in reality. Reality that is so vivid. So vivid that moving on is very hard to accomplish.

From now on. Everything will change. I will be true to myself. I will Avoid things that might hurt other people. I will avoid hurting my physical body. I will really stop smoking for good to recover my beaten body. I will make sure thaf I will heal from any depression. I will make sure to be a good person in everything that I do. I will focus my attention to my job. I will make sure to stop chasing people that dont deserve my love and respect. I will make sure to be as truthful as possible. So help me god!